What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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