I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
