I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
