i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize