That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
