Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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