You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
