One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
