I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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