There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
