There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
