so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
