sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
