All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
