he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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