He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
