Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
