Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?

(720): View more from Colorado

Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?

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(540): View more from Virginia

Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.

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(928): View more from Arizona

So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.

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(989): View more from Michigan

He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.

(1-989): View more from Michigan

I'll uninvite my mom

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(702): View more from Nevada

dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos

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(615): View more from Tennessee

You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.

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