Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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