someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
