are you still at the devil's house?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
