it was like eating out sand paper
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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