Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
