Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
