this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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