well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Randomize
