Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
