new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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