What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
