just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize