i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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