you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
You are the jesus of drinking
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
