I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The air was thick with penises
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
