Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
