I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
