She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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