Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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