but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
