tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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