just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
17 year olds will be the death of me.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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