Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
