Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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