she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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