What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
