i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize