we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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