he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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