Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
