I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
no more duck duck goose at the bar
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
