im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
